Indian Matchmaking is a Indian documentary television series produced by Smriti Mundhra. Indian Matchmaking was released on July 16, , on Netflix. Mundhra named the casting the biggest hurdle of the show, going through a client list of families and calling to see if they were willing to be on camera. Mundhra also noted that the series initially started with about a dozen singles but with some that “fell off” during production. The show received mixed reviews between critics and social media users. In addition to showing ” classist ” and ” casteist ” stereotypes, the show was criticized for whitewashing the idea of arranged marriages. The Los Angeles Times followed up with the couples appearing on the show and reported that they are not together anymore.
What ‘Indian Matchmaking’ gets wrong — and right
Is ‘Selling Sunset’ Fake? Chrissy Teigen Questions if Agents are Real. Love ‘Lovecraft Country’? The series follows the most prominent matchmaker in India as she pairs up singles across continents, using her decades of experience and keen instincts for matchmaking.
The Netflix dating show updates the arranged marriage narrative—but leaves the custom’s major problems untouched.
These are just some of the things several South Asian women say they have been told by their families and matchmakers who have tried to arrange their marriage with a series of prospective suitors. Religion, caste, and class compatibility are often given importance within the practice. It is challenging, and likely impossible, to condense and critically evaluate how arranged marriages work across the South Asian subcontinent within the format of one article or TV show. One of the major drawbacks of Indian Matchmaking, critics say, is that it focuses on matchmaking within the selective bubble of mostly wealthy, upper-caste North Indian Hindus, and uncritically normalizes many aspects of a deeply complex system.
It has also prompted several South Asian women to share their own problematic, and at times traumatic, experiences with the process. BuzzFeed News collected anecdotes from women who documented their experiences on social media as well as from interviews with South Asian women who shared their own stories and critiques. Her parents began setting her up with matches as soon as Gururaja returned to India in after finishing college in the US.
Gururaja said she encountered several microaggressions, subtle sexism, and a lot of anti-gay prejudice during these meetings. There were also a lot of inherent assumptions that she would move wherever the man lived, she said, and her own education and career goals were constantly dismissed. The two professional matchmakers featured on the show advise their women clients to learn to compromise on their own ambitions and dreams for the sake of a good suitor.
Matchmaking illustrates the ills of Indian society | Opinion
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Pros and cons of women making the first move
We are in the middle of a pandemic. Work from home has started taking a toll and there are at least a million things to worry about at the moment. Like jobs, making ends meet, daily chores that never seem to end. And yet, all people could talk about over the weekend was Indian Matchmaking , a Netflix docu-series that appear to fan all the stereotypes about Indians and the system of arranged marriages.
All these various bits and pieces are tied together with the expert narration of Sima Taparia, the matchmaker from Mumbai who finds life partners for girls and boys from the upper echelons of society. Thus begins the eight-episode Netflix series, jumping between Texas and Mumbai, offering glimpses into how life and marriage is conducted among the rich and privileged Indians and NRIs.
In the Netflix series Indian Matchmaking, the importance of skin color arrives quickly in She suggests that dark-skinned women might find it smarter to simply opt out of their So she has the upper hand, to choose the boys.
Now available to stream, the series follows Mumbai-based matchmaker Sima Taparia as she painstakingly works with singles and their families in India and America to find desirable mates for marriage. One client, New Jersey-based event planner Nadia, wonders if her Indian-ness will come into question because of her Guyanese heritage.
With the global reach of Netflix, Mundhra saw an opportunity to present a look at dating and relationships through the very specific lens of the South Asian experience that would reach a wide audience. That we have all sorts of different backgrounds, different ideals and ideologies. I think you can sort of learn a lot just from the examples and the specific journey of the participants.
Mundhra ultimately met her now-husband in graduate school. There was this refreshing honesty about her, and absolute passion for what she does. Even as dating sites such as shaadi. Viewers get a glimpse of that process, which includes an emphasis on horoscopes and astrology.
Inside Netflix’s eye-opening look at arranged marriage, your next reality TV obsession
Netflix docu-series Indian Matchmaking ends with a montage of happy, elderly couples in a bid to validate the concept of arranged marriage. Married for decades, these couples, especially women, seemingly, had no say in choosing their partners and unquestioningly agreed to what their parents wanted. In India, men and women are expected to get married when they reach a certain age as there is a fear that they would not find the right partner, or no partner at all, as they grow older.
It is , but the perception still holds true across caste, class and communities.
In arranging a marriage, the families consult astrologers regularly until a match is found. Sometimes the boy and girl are allowed to get to know each other long.
The rhetoric of modernity, education, and progress is a powerful one that deludes us into thinking that regressive and repressive aspects of match-making are either a thing of the past, the rural, or the uneducated and uninformed. Denting this urban self-fashioning is the Netflix series Indian Matchmaking , which has held up a mirror to Indian society.
Rather, it has shown how casteism and sexism merge with money, high-status, and modernity in the urban milieus of Mumbai, Delhi, New York, and Chicago. Crucially, they consider their role as not limited to suggesting matches but of also undertaking a maternalistic paternalistic approach by advising prospective brides and grooms to change their attitudes and expectations in order to have a happy married life.
Most important, this series has brought attention to an oft-repeated woe that the onus of sustaining the marriage squarely falls on women. That is the value we have been brought up with. Prospective grooms, on the other hand, are disconcertingly presented as reluctant men, who are to be cajoled and emotionally manipulated by their mothers, sisters into even agreeing to meet a prospective bride.
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Sliders: The preference sliders narrow down your results to a particular range of popularity or length. Move the left dot to indicate the minimum you’d accept, the right dot to the maximum. Your results will all be in-between. Style Preferences: Click “prefer” or “avoid” to help the MatchMaker know which style qualities you care most about. The MatchMaker will take your preferences into consideration, but it’s not an absolute — for instance, it may not be able to find a full list of names just like Luigi and Francesco that are NOT Italian!
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I remember reading a cartoon a number of years ago in which two parents were telling their daughter, “You can marry anyone you want as long as he’s a brahmin. Certainly the tradition of marrying within one’s caste, or jati occupation , and community language group , is still the strongest one in our global Hindu community.
New trends, however, are also manifesting, as our article points out. For example, it is common these days to marry someone of your own profession, often having met each other in graduate school. The jati of birth might be quite different for each and also the language group in India–however what the couple has in common is working in the same profession, a new form of caste system so to speak. On the other hand, a religious community that marries into itself, such as devotees of the same guru parampara, can provide a continuity of religion and culture over a period of many lives for the reincarnating souls enabling these souls to maximize their spiritual progress.
POur general advice: the greater the difference in cultural and religious backgrounds, the more important it is that the couple take time to get to know one another before marriage takes place. Satguru Bodhinatha Veylanswami. Marriage is a union not only of a boy and girl, but of their families as well. Not leaving such crucial matters to chance, all family members participate in finding the most suitable spouse for the son or daughter and thereafter commit hearts and minds to assist in times of need.
Gun Kundli Milan. Astrology plays an important role in one’s life in selecting a life partner. The institution of marriage is a matter of commitment and goes well if you have conviction for it, but fails abruptly if you lose interest in the fellowship. Horoscopes are called the mirror of one’s identity. There is nobody in this world that is averse to see this mirror.
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Viewers Binged Netflix’s “Indian Matchmaking,” But For Some The Show Brought Up Painful Memories
Meet Pradhyuman Maloo. He designs jewelry, loves to cook, travels the world, and lives an adventurous life. Not having found someone who matches his wavelength, he sought Taparia out over the usual dating app sojourn.
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PG min Comedy, Drama. In s England, a well meaning but selfish young woman meddles in the love lives of her friends. Votes: 19, R min Comedy, Drama, Romance. Follows the lives of eight very different couples in dealing with their love lives in various loosely interrelated tales all set during a frantic month before Christmas in London, England. While the arrival of wealthy gentlemen sends her marriage-minded mother into a frenzy, willful and opinionated Elizabeth Bennet matches wits with haughty Mr.
Votes: 73, A Chinese family discovers their grandmother has only a short while left to live and decide to keep her in the dark, scheduling a wedding to gather before she dies. Matchmaker Sima Taparia guides clients in the U. Stars: Sima Taparia , Vyasar M. Ganesan , Pradhyuman Maloo , Aparna Shewakramani. Votes: 1, PG min Drama, Romance.